The End of the Year is Nigh!

This year has been mostly calm (well, for me anyway – there’s been a lot of shit going on everywhere else…although, since I firmly believe that the rest of the world is a figment of my imagination, I guess it doesn’t matter…although it feels like it matters…what if the rest of the world IS real…this is too much to deal with right now…what was I saying?). The year…it has been pretty quiet...and safe. There were one or two moments of drama, but they were confronted, and made less dramatic. There were few extremes of high or low.

The ‘happiness’ experts say that an even flow of mood, with occasional highs and lows, is a healthy and realistic mental state. I tend to agree. I don’t expect life to be “oh happy day!!” everyday, or at all, really. Occasional elation is ok, you just gotta be careful it doesn’t become too expansive. Otherwise, the Karmic Masters, who live in an enormous purple castle, somewhere near the South Pole, will decree you’ve had TOO much joy and so must now be made to crawl agonizingly in the depths of misery. Bastards.

Physically, I’m good. I eat healthily, mostly. I could probably exercise more. I sleep a lot, which I seem to need to do, otherwise I become depressed.

I don’t have a job. An occupation. How will I know where I fit in societies’ hierarchy if I don’t have an occupational label? The occupation I had (which I had for a long time) was making me depressed. Last year, when I was working, my days were often barely bearable (not even alliteration could offer comfort). So I’m leaving occupations alone for the moment. I suspect that the occupation I’m properly suited to is something quite obscure, and, as such, may take a while to find. I’m keeping my eyes open, though, should our paths cross.

I probably spend a little too much time alone. Occasionally, my weird lonerness slips into loneliness.

Lurv…well…it has stoically avoided me for so long now that I’d probably need to climb on top of a meteorite and crash through Lurv’s ceiling to get it to notice me. Fucker.

Overall, I think I’m in a phase of moderate inertia, with intermittent bouts of momentum. I suspect I’ll be in this phase for a while longer, and to attempt to fight it may be detrimental: I think there’s a risk of going into a phase of total inertia with no momentum.